Today is one of those endorphin rich days. It’s amzing how one can feel so good one day, and others not. But I have to attribute today’s feelings to a few things:
1) My morning stretch-worship time. I went out in the back yard this morning, and applied some things I learned at a workshop the other day (note: the leader was right into Tai Chi, so I to gleaned out the good stuff). I spent about 10 minutes stretching and doing some of the movements I learned – stretching the spine, stretching my main areas of tightness, like my legs and back, moving around, and worshipping the whole time, as the new morning sun rained warnth down, and the cool morning and wet dew filled the air. It was glorious. And my soul was filled, (and, of course, the oxygen is now coursing through my body. Great way to start the day, with a song and a prayer and a stretch!
2) Now I am at Cher’s coffe house in downtown Kelowna, sipping a Highlander Grogg (large), listening to Jazz, on my favourite machine. Man. boom-daboom chick daboom babadoop dado deedledit chickdoboom. Does it get better?
3) I wrote a letter to the leadership of my old church, and finally sent it off. It took two years to write it – sheesh. Every time I sat down to write more, nothing would come. It’s been a very hard time dealing with the decision that it’s time to move on. I have attended there since I was 14, and I can honestly say that I would not be who I am today without them. So many beliefs, so many ways of seeing life and God, the awesome examples of what a healthy family looks like, which I didn’t have growing up, came from this body. In many ways, this was my surrogate family.
And that can be unhealthy too. And I know it’s time to move on. There is such an excitement in me as I seek and search for the Father in the midst of this transition. But finally writing that letter, and sending it off, was very freeing. I know that now I am able to move forward much more easily. Looking for the Father, each and every day. Father, where are you today? Where are you taking me today? I am listening. I am waiting, expectantly.
4) I am coming to some deep realizations of who I am, and where I have come from. It is an exciting journey of discovery. I ask that if you are reading this, pray that this process would continue. Old wounds are being healed, strengths are being solidified. I begin to feel somewhat like Rob Roy, righteous anger rising up in me against many beings and things that deserve that kind of anger. Make me mold me make me Holy Spirit. Keep me broken inside, moldable makeable supple. Maybe I am stretching spiritually too.
5) The new school year, and working with the public system. I am so eager to rub shoulders with the rest of the world. I have been incubated for so long. Get this bubble around me off – I want to tread where serpents and scorpions crawl, and nothing shall by any means hurt me.
Well, that was fun. Woohoo!